Need Help?
If something does not feel right to you, then it’s not OK.
Through our crisis line, we are here to help you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Follow the simple steps to be put through to your local Refuge. You will be automatically directed to an Advocate in your region.
If you need urgent help please call 111
Crisis line: 0800 REFUGE
0800 733 843
Our Services
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CRISIS LINE
Taupō Women’s Refuge offers the unique service of providing a 24 hour phone line / crisis line 07 3771055 or 0800733843 (free from mobile phone)
After hours your call will be answered by Whakarongorau, a team of highly trained specialist who will complete an initial assessment and place you in touch with an advocate if criteria is met.
During business hours you will be connected to an advocate in a timely manner.
The staff of Taupō Women’s Refuge work tirelessly in providing 24 hour access to the Refuge safe house and support and advocacy toward eliminating Family Violence in our community.
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ADVICE
The role of Taupō Women’s Refuge is to support the decisions that you make.
If you are undecided about leaving your relationship, want to leave your relationship or have recently left your relationship we can support and advise you on the best and safest way to achieve this.
Taupō Women’s Refuge works very closely with other Taupō organisations to ensure the best outcomes for everyone. The sharing of some information with other agencies ensures everyone is working to the same page.
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INFORMATION
Family court orders including protection and parenting orders.
Impacts of family violence on children
Empowerment
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SAFE HOUSE
Taupō Women’s Refuge provides a safe, warm, comfortable home to women and children who have experienced Family Violence who need to leave their own homes for their safety.
This service provides women and children the time to put plans in place and to ensure their safety at the same time. Usually a small rent is charged for your time in the safe house to cover day to day costs incurred, like power.
Taupō Specific Services
At Taupō Women’s Refuge we maintain strong relationships with other social service agencies in Taupō. We will work with you to decide which service may best suit your needs and the needs of your children.
Some of the Taupo specific services with whom we work include (although certainly is not limited to):
At Women’s Refuge, we provide the support and information you need when you’re dealing with violence in your life.
Family violence is a pattern of power, control and coercion. Abuse is not just physical, trust your intuition.
If something does not feel right to you, then it’s not OK.
If you are being abused, remember it’s not your fault. No one deserves to be abused, and we are always here to help you.
At Women’s Refuge, we won’t judge you. We will listen to you and support you to make choices for your safety.
FAMILY VIOLENCE
What is family violence?
Family violence is when someone uses coercion, power, fear, or intimidation to control someone they are in a close, intimate, or household relationship with
It can be physical, sexual, psychological, or economic.
It usually, but not always, happens in the home (not in a public place), therefore it is hidden.
The coercion, control, and other abuse tactics are often subtle and difficult for victims to explain to others.
These tactics adversely impact every aspect of victims’ (and their children’s) lives, including their health, their dignity, and their opportunities to build safe, viable, and fulfilling lives.
The majority of perpetrators are men, and the majority of victims are women and gender minorities.
Disabled women, rainbow/takatāpui (especially people who are bisexual and transgender) wāhine Māori, and young women are the most likely to be subjected to family violence.
ABUSE
Different types of abuse
Here are different types of abusive behaviour that can occur.
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Threatening to harm you or the children, damaging belongings, stalking, isolating from friends and whānau, actions or threats, hurting animals or pets, constant put downs and belittling, exposing children to trauma.
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Withholding money, monitoring the finances, making all the financial decisions, demanding proof of all expenditure and checking receipts, allotting a allowance.
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Forced to have sex, feeling sexually harassed, being made to engage in degrading or unsafe sexual behavior, being made to watch pornographic material.
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Slapping, beating, punching, kicking, strangling, shaking, biting or pinching. It may involve the use of weapons and can cause serious long term injury or fatality.
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Feeling as though your spirit/wairua is being attacked, stops you from expressing your spiritual or religious beliefs, stops you going to church/ temple, puts down your beliefs, uses their/your religious beliefs to justify their behaviour.
SERVICES
At Women’s Refuge we are much more than safe houses. ?
The majority of our clients are in the community.
There are advocates in the Refuges throughout New Zealand trained in all areas of family violence and they will be able to advise and support you wherever they can including a plan to leave.
You can call them for a confidential chat, you don’t have to commit to anything if you don’t want to they are just here to listen.
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➜ 24 Hour crises line, 0800 REFUGE
➜ Home and community visits
➜ Support in isolated regions
➜ 24/7 access to our safe houses
➜ Advocacy when dealing with police, legal, court, WINZ, housing, doctors, schools and Oranga Tamariki
➜ Referrals to counsellors, doctors, lawyers and other support services
➜ Education and support groups for women and children about living free from violence
Know that there are stories from brave women who have found the courage to leave abusive relationships, and been rewarded with peaceful, loving lives.
THINKING OF LEAVING?
Are you thinking about leaving? We encourage you to make a plan, be cautious about how you implement it, and make positive choices in your life.
Five things we’ve learned about leaving
1. Leaving doesn’t get easier with practice.
2. Staying with an abuser is likely to get harder to cope with and more dangerous for you and your children as time goes on.
3. The reason you leave the first time will almost always be the same reason you leave the last time.
4. You, and only you, will be the best judge of when it is safest to leave.
5. All your efforts to keep the peace at home will never work. Why not? Because domestic violence is about your abuser, not you. It is their responsibility to change – and you can only choose whether or not to be around them in the meantime.
Be proud that you have done whatever you needed to do in order to keep yourself and your children safe, but you all deserve to live without fear, shame and anxiety.
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There is no right or wrong way to feel at this moment. You are likely to be feeling a mix of emotions that change in strength and urgency throughout the day, and over time.
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so try to get clear in your mind before you make your final decision. Talking to someone you trust or people who know about violence against women may help you with the choices you need to make.
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You can phone our confidential Crisis-line if you want to talk to a Women’s Refuge advocate on 0800 REFUGE or 0800 733 843.
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whether you’re choosing to stay for now or leaving the relationship. Please get in touch with your local refuge to discuss making a plan, you can find their contact details on our website.
And finally, know that there are stories from brave women who have found the courage to leave abusive relationships, and been rewarded with peaceful, loving lives.
Because around half of all murders committed each year in New Zealand are domestic violence related, many women believe leaving was the best decision they ever made.
WHAT TO DO
How to help a loved one who is experiencing abuse
Only the person using violence can choose whether the violence stops or continues.
Women might make the choice to end the relationship, but that doesn’t mean they can end the violence.
People often want to tell women to ‘just leave’ their abusers. But leaving is not always safer than staying.
Women are most likely to be killed around the time that they are separating from their abusers. Of women who access Women’s Refuge, 50% believe their abusers might kill them at the time that they reach out for help.
Being a victim of family violence is never a choice.
For more information on how to help a loved one call our crisis-line on 0800 Refuge.
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“I’m worried because he seems to make you feel bad a lot the time. How safe do you feel with him?”
“I’m wondering if you have any concerns about how he’s behaving towards you?”
“If anything is happening at home and you don’t feel safe, I’m always up for a chat about it.”
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“It’s okay to talk about it here, you can tell me as much or as little as you want.”
“I’m really glad you told me.”
“This was not your fault.”
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“Are you safe right now?”
“Would you like me to call the police?”
“Would you like to tell me some more about that?”
“How are you coping with that?”
“Are you safe right now?”
“Would you like me to call the police?”
“Would you like to tell me some more about that?”
“How are you coping with that?”
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It takes a lot of courage and often a lot of time to leave an abuser. It is important to be non-judgemental. Respect your loved one’s decisions even if they decide to stay – they still need your love and support. On average it can take 7 attempts to leave for good. For more information on how to help a loved one call our crisis-line on 0800 Refuge.
It takes a lot of courage and often a lot of time to leave an abuser. It is important to be non-judgemental. Respect your loved one’s decisions even if they decide to stay – they still need your love and support.
On average it can take 7 attempts to leave for good.